John Mayer komentuje HOKEJ

29. března 2008 v 3:14 | Amor |  orgasmus dne


Svým posledním počinem rozšiřuje John Mayer řady skalních fanoušků o kompletní mužskou populaci této planety.

Holky úplně milujou ty jeho písničky napsané na koleně kdesi v parku a zpívané sladkým hláskem po klubech USA za zvuků klasické kytary. Když ho slyším zvracel bych, ale musím uznat, že při poslechu těch slaďáků holky v posteli roztahují nohy tak nějak automaticky. Dodnes jsem nepřišel na postatu tohoto triku, ale neřeším to. Koneckonců z internetu stažené písničky Dona Juana Mayera jsou přece jen levnější než večeře, kino nebo sexuální hračky.
Johnovi to ale viditelně nestačí. Možná mu už doteklo, že ženy tvoří jen poměrnou většinu celosvětové populace a že by bylo dobré získat si i nějaké ty fanoušky s penisem. Ale jak na to? Frontmanem Kabátů se už asi nikdy nestane, tak to celé vzal jednoduše od lesa, respektive přes sport. Chlapi přece sport žerou!
A když říkám sport, myslím tím jmenovitě hokej. Ježiš, co to zase melu. To John má na mysli hokej. Já vidím baseball. Ale z komentátorského stanoviště slyším hlas Johna. WTF?!






Jedno se Johnovi musí nechat, zápas Red Sox kdesi v Japonsku komentuje stejně kvalitně jako to dělají třeba profesionálové v TV Nova:

"Let's see what happens when the person pitching starts the inning... (nadhazovač háže strike)... and that happens! Apparently it was an "S", according to the board."

..."It hits the wall and bounces pass the white line... I'm not sure what that means".

Pro vysvětlenou Johnovi, komentátorům TV Nova a nám všem ostatním: první nadhoz je jasný strike, rozhodčí indikuje pravou rukou a na světelné tabuli se rozsvítí modré světlo a znak S. Druhý nadhoz je ball, rozhodčí neindikuje nic, na světelné tabuli se rozvítí žluté světlo a znak B. V tuto chvíli je stav 1 strike 1 ball. Třetí nadhoz pálkař nezvládne umístit do pole, balon se v mrtvé zóně odrazí od zdi a padá za bílou postranní čáru. Znamená to chybný odpal započítaný jako strike. Na konci videa je tedy stav 2 trike 1 ball (přičemž pro vyautování hráče na pálce je potřeba 3 strike).

+ nezbytná terminologie:
  • "the person pitching" = pitcher = nadhazovač (dle informací Huston Street)
  • "inning" = směna (dle informací 8 směna zápasu)
  • "S" = strike = započítaný správný nadhoz (do strike zóny)
  • "B" = ball = započítaný špatný nadhoz (mimo strike zónu)

PS: John Mayer je mimochodem známý taktéž jako velký šprýmař. Pokud se tedy jedná o vtip, pochopí ho snad jen fanoušci hokeje.
 

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